For far too long, I lived under the guise of being a self-assured working mom and executive coach, thinking I was impervious to the trap of people-pleasing. It wasn’t that I sought everyone’s approval, but rather, my actions and decisions were intricately woven with the thread of how others perceived me. This subtle manipulation of my persona was not overtly visible, not even to me, for the longest time. It took a profound journey of introspection to peel back the layers and uncover the nuanced ways in which I was minimizing my presence, playing it small due to an underlying fear of judgments and misunderstandings.
As a life coach, particularly focusing on executive coaching for women, I’ve come to recognize this pattern is all too common among working moms. We juggle the dual pressures of professional ambition and family responsibilities, often at the expense of our own authenticity. We bend and twist to meet expectations, fearing that stepping out of line might cost us our hard-earned respect at work or the harmony in our homes. This balancing act, while impressive, can lead to burnout and overwhelm, diluting the very essence of who we are and what we wish to achieve.
The realization that I was compromising my authenticity for the sake of others’ comfort was unsettling. It wasn’t a moment of epiphany but a gradual understanding that my pursuit of work-life balance was skewed, prioritizing external validation over my inner peace and satisfaction. This misalignment was the root of my unease, a constant background noise that I had mistaken for normalcy.
Embarking on this journey to reclaim my authentic self was both challenging and enlightening. I had to confront uncomfortable truths about my desires and the discrepancies between what I truly wanted and what I believed I should want, as dictated by societal norms and expectations. This process of realignment, though fraught with vulnerability, proved to be a pivotal point in my personal and professional life.
In my role as an executive coach for women, I emphasize the importance of work-life harmony over balance. Harmony suggests a synergy between the various aspects of our lives, where each part coexists without the need for constant trade-offs or sacrifices. Achieving this harmony begins with honoring our authentic voices and desires, setting boundaries that protect our time and energy from being constantly siphoned off by others’ demands.
The liberation that comes from living authentically is transformative. It’s about shedding the weight of external expectations and embracing the unique constellation of our desires, values, and aspirations. For working moms especially, this transformation can be profound. It redefines our approach to leadership, both at home and in the workplace, allowing us to lead with integrity and genuine passion.
To anyone feeling trapped in the cycle of subtle people-pleasing, know that breaking free is not only possible but deeply rewarding. It requires courage to step into the light of your truth, to acknowledge and pursue what truly matters to you. This path, though lined with challenges, leads to a place of greater fulfillment, joy, and authentic living.
In my practice, both personally and as a life coach, I’ve seen the ripple effects of this transformation. Women who embrace their authentic selves report a significant reduction in stress and an increase in overall well-being. They navigate their roles as working moms with renewed vigor, no longer haunted by the specter of burnout and overwhelm. Instead, they find strength in their authenticity, using it as a beacon to guide their decisions and actions.
Embracing authenticity is not a destination but a continuous journey of self-discovery and growth. It’s a commitment to living in alignment with your true self, creating a life that resonates with your deepest values and desires. As you embark on this journey, remember, the path to authenticity is uniquely yours, filled with boundless opportunities for personal and professional fulfillment.
To my fellow working moms and women in leadership, I invite you to join me on this journey of authenticity. Together, let’s uncover our true desires, set boundaries that honor our well-being, and cultivate a life of work-life harmony that reflects who we truly are.
Your coach, cheerleader, and accountability partner, Shayla
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